Falling Prey to the Hideous Marketing Onslaught That Is Paris Hilton

I think the message here is that if you dare to dream that Paris Hilton will pretend to pork you so everyone you know will think you're awesome, then your dream just might come true, if you live in a music video.

Also, you should consider the possibility that some people whom you know might consider boning Ms. Hilton to be a net negative. Make sure you assess your social scene correctly before aspiring to receive make-believe-pity-fucks from manufactured celebrities.

What the hell is the matter with you, Reality? Why do you insist on fucking with me like this?